A baking contest posted into Instagram. Two cakes, one white and blue and the other brown and purple, showcased in several pictures. It was through this post that Seniors Jennifer Yung and Roland Chia first met. “She actually messaged me about it,” said Roland. “And that’s when we first started talking.”
Like with Jennifer and Roland, social media often plays a large role in relationships. Today, students have their cellphones on them at all times (or they did until the phone ban). But that experience doesn’t extend to their teachers. Many teachers at South never owned a cellphone until college. “You used the old fashioned telephone, which was a family phone, [to call someone],” said Mrs. Jane Callaghan.
“In my case, it was calling up the house and talking to the parents, and ringing the doorbell and meeting the parents,” said Ms. Joanne Kostopoulos.
Teachers had to worry about meeting the parents before a relationship has truly begun. Between house calls and showing up in person, avoiding the parents rarely worked out. For current students, texting and social media allow them to bypass that initial meeting phase and talk one-on-one without standing where a parent could listen in.
But the experiences of teachers and students do have similarities. Social media makes spontaneous meetings easier, and teachers could also find that same kind of spontaneity when they were younger. “It’s not something I ever did, but people used to put [dating] ads in the papers.”
Dating ads worked like dating profiles and allowed for people to just meet up and potentially start a relationship. Though not as common, this system was much more involved than sending a text or adding someone to social media, and it could often have the same end results.
Similarities between student and teacher experiences pop up all the time (especially when it comes to dates). Most couples tend to keep dates casual. A couple will often hang out at one of their houses or go to a mall or just spend time together at school. Even in more “date” dates, going to see a movie, like teachers did, or going to see a broadway show, like students do, are similar activities. Going out to eat pizza and going out to eat sushi are also similar. The only difference would be that dates cost a bit more today, though that really depends on the couple. It’s hard to generalize when dates are so personal. Ms. Blank went skiing over the weekend with her boyfriend when she was younger because “that’s just what [their] families did.”
Despite what some might think, technology hasn’t played as big of a role in relationships as a knee jerk reaction might assume. Of course, technology increases accessibility in couples and allows for relationships to thrive even with physical distance. There’s no denying that technology has had an impact, whether it’s positive or negative. “There would be times where I think she’s not responding because she’s watching something, and I see that in myself too. And I don’t think that’s fair for both sides,” said Roland.
However, many couples today set boundaries when it comes to communicating and spending time together. “We set our rules when we hang out. Like setting our phones away,” Junior Rachel You said. “I think it’s pretty manageable.”
Dating relies on the couple, and couples generally have the same goal: spending time with one another. Ms. Leslie Blank, who also dislikes video calls and texting, shares that sentiment. “I just prefer face to face where you can gauge people better. It’s more personal.”
“For me, texting is just a way to connect when we’re further apart,” said Roland. “I prefer real life over text.”
